Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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