I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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