The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize