so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
