and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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