Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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