so explain again why im purple
no
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
