its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
