I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
My cat gives me a boner
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
