I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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