Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
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