Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
