Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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