I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
