I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
