i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
