I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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