that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
