I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
