very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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