We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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