is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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