haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
