And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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