You work out of a Hotel?
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
