Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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