Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize