I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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