erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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