Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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