Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
