it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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