In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We are two peas in an std pod
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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