I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
