What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
