His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
