So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
