where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
her vagine was all disorganized.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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