I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
