Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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