I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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