He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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