i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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