i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
