i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
