He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
