Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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