**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
