He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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