Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
