I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
